Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
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