were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
My dad is sitting where you rode me
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