You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
Randomize
