I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
Randomize
