I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
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