She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize
