just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
Randomize
