gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
Randomize
