you turned your livingroom into a bong?
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
Randomize
