I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
