Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
