Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
I want to walk on stilts...naked
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
Randomize
