i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
