would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
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