Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize
