kristin has been a bad kristin
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
Randomize
