I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
Randomize
