He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
Randomize
