god I wish I could record you sometimes, you're so neurotic
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
how does that bad decision feel?
Randomize
