Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
Randomize
