she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
Randomize
