guess who was drunk and crawling in the middle of the road and got brought home by the police last night? HINT: ME
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
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