I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
Randomize
