THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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