so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
Randomize
