have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
