fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
Randomize
