it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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