i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Randomize
