handjob tips. give me some.
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
Randomize
