she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
just found out that she named her cat after me.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
Randomize
