the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
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