We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
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