You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
I woke up this morning to the buzzer on my oven going off... I cooked fish sticks at 425 degrees for 5 hours last night. my house smells awesome
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
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