I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
Considering that my ex-wife dumped me to become a lesbian, the Universe owes me a threesome.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
Randomize
