That's intense
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
