we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
How come I'm the only one who's around when people show up? I had just taken a shit, I wasn't wearing pants, phantom of the opera was playing and the fridge said PENIS.
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
Randomize
