You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
Randomize
