your thong is hanging out like whoa
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
Randomize
