I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
The bartender told me the best pick-up line was to look deep into her eyes and tell her your gonna flick her vagina
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
Randomize
