WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
I just talked to a CEO of a fortune 500 company while pooping. I LOVE being self employed.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
