Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
Randomize
