Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
Randomize
