I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Randomize
