i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
Randomize
