D3 body, D1 cock
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Randomize
