Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
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