Sorry, its so late. Remember your fat friend with huge boobs. i need her number..its an emergency
your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
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