He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
Do you have feelings for this penis?
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