U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
We're too hungover to prance.
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
Randomize
