I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Randomize
