Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
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